Literature’s finest offerings have been penned down in times of deep introspection by pen. Like Viktor Frankl’s ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’, we each get bouts of self-reflection where-in we are each searching within the deep corners of our inner subconscious, our reason to live. At 47, when you’ve barely managed to get out of your mid-life crisis, these bouts may be rare but still occur.
For those of you who know me closely would know that I pen down my thoughts and over the years, these introspective thoughts have found a way onto my diaries whose pile keeps increasing by my bedside table. I’m working towards publishing them in a special book someday ( just throwing it out to the universe here) and as a way of manifestation, I already have the title tattooed on my hand!
I recently read a fabulous book called Big Magic and it really has inspired me to get my act together and possibly work more diligently towards writing. It hasn’t been the easiest of things in the last few months where I’ve just been blocked. I sit with my notebook somedays and just gaze into nothingness and just haven’t been able to get to that space in me where words would just flow. Maybe my thoughts are rushing too fast and my pen simply cannot catch up. And when you cannot be a writer, I be the next best thing: a very thorough reader. The best advice I got from the book was ‘Find some time in your life to do something you enjoy for no reason at all and remember that you are not required to save the world with your creativity .. so just go ahead and create.’ It takes the pressure off your incessant need to be perfect at everything as if the world’s balance hangs by a thread if you mess up. I don’t know if I could learn a new language or dance the perfect salsa or learn to master the piano or just move to a new city ..but I do know a few things I can do for sure:
Count my blessings to have the courage to write.
Treasure my true friends and family.
Be more fearless about my work.
Allow myself to fail.
Start saving more.
Start ticking off that bucket list – its time.
Tell myself everyday – age is just a number.
Keep my material and economic growth second to my spiritual and emotional well being.
Laugh a whole. Lot. More.
Treat myself to a solo adventure ever so often to pause and listen to myself.
And now coming to what this post is really about…
Life at 47 and is mid-life crisis real?
Yes, there definitely is a change but I can’t quite put a finger on it. If I had to start somewhere, I’d think back and take note of that image I had 25 years ago. The same mental image you had about your life path when you were 15 and see where you are today. Even for those lucky few where it matches completely, wait patiently for the canvas to take on a different colour without notice. The crisis happens when you cannot cope, your emotions and attachments take over and then there are cracks. Now, comes the tricky part of mending those cracks. Being true to yourself is a very hard thing to do but one trick that has worked for me is to stand infront of the mirror and just say things aloud, its not only a release but also mostly the truth. Invest more time in knowing how you have grown as a person, what really makes you happy, who fills your emotional cups, who drains them, who really listens to you when you want to be heard. Find your release and release. Some surrender to a higher power and await miracles (definitely not me). Some bottle up their feelings and emotions which leads to an ill mind and subsequently, an ill body. Some just run away only to be haunted again. Give yourselves time to heal, actively nurse that pain and heal and then release, reboot and resurface!
My future is incandescent and I’m only 47.
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